Collection 2: Lost & Found- A Journey Of Self Through The 20s
Freedom, magic, possibilities — that’s what I expected from my twenties when I was growing up. Every time I got upset with my parents as a hormonal teenager, I would imagine living by myself, where nobody could bother me. Every time I watched a romantic movie or read a Mills & Boon, I thought my twenties would be the time I’d be one half of an epic love story.
I’m a girl and no surprises about my passion for shopping all things necessary, good-looking and frivolous, alike. So that was my plan for my money. And a job in fashion, ooo glamour, fun.
Now, as my twenties wave goodbye, I find myself wondering — why were the even here all this while? This decade hasn’t exactly been kind. I do have my freedom, but sometimes I end up feeling completely bamboozled by my own decisions. I’ve had love stories, but they were riddled with all kinds of unlovely things that no-one prepares you for. I enjoy living by myself, but oh, how I miss home when the helps don’t turn up or unwanted pests do… nightmare.
Shopping? Yes, that’s the one thing that’s been consistently great. I work — in fashion, even. But let me tell you — not glamorous AT ALL. Fun? Well, there are moments. Like when you shop from The Goodmess 🙂
The twenties are a decade-long rollercoaster. They start off tender, naïve, free-spirited, with not much balance. Sometimes we don’t have any plans and just go with the flow. The flow gets turned upside down, and we try to come up with plans/ restrictions to be better prepared in the future, to save ourselves from disappointment. Other times, we start off with too many plans, a big image, a sense of control. And maybe we forget to live while we are chasing. Either way, nature has a way of balancing things out. However we start, we are forced to discover the value of the route we didn’t take.
I’ve met people I thought would stay forever — they didn’t. Even if they did, they were ever-changing. I was ever-changing too. Then I met some people I thought would leave soon because they seemed too good to be true. But somehow, they ended up seeing magic in me — the magic they never themselves wanted to leave. And do you know when they saw that magic? When I was fully aware of it myself, proud of it, and not dimming it for anyone.
I realised that no matter how much I loved someone else, nothing was as important as my own well-being — prioritising and loving myself.
The rest of the time, people were temporary- just all kinds of supporting characters, helping me shape my own character.
There were situations that made me stop believing in the good — both in myself and in the world. But eventually I learnt, the key to living a better life has been finding my spirit again and believing in all things good — abundance, love, ease, luck, fulfilment.
No matter how much we do it, comparison is still absolutely pointless. One can’t change what is, through comparison anyway. Someone will always have more money, a better job, a happier life, more confidence, an easier time, a healthier relationship, stronger friendships, a fitter body — perhaps even my dream life. I know what I want, so I buckle up and work for it. No lies, I cry about it, but I still go and get what I want. We all have dreams, and however crazy or simple they may seem, they’re what keep our souls going. They’re the fire that ignite us when the going gets hard, the magic that keeps us going through the mess. I’ve taken on things I never expected to, I’ve let go of things I never expected to, I’ve pushed my limits and sometimes held onto my ideas because the time wasn’t right. I’ve shown extreme faith and patience for something to actualise. Maybe the rest of my life was falling apart, but it was the pursuit of the dream that saved me.
This decade comes with its fun and wild side too. We are by ourselves for the first time, earning our own money. We indulge in all kinds of things that life has to offer. We try to be the fun and daring adults we’ve seen in films. We befriend people who match our crazy or become the wind beneath our wings. These are some beautiful moments — non-judgmental, safe spaces to just let out and build different parts of ourselves.
And sometimes we have to do that only in our own presence. That is hard, but we owe ourselves joy — with or without anyone.
Parents, grandparents, school, college — they all teach us how to be for almost twenty years. But the twenties themselves feel like a lesson you didn’t come prepared for. No matter how many books are written, how many times our parents and well-wishers tell us about it, how many times our friends yell at us about it — we learn at our own pace, through our own actions. These are lessons that shape us for what lies ahead. These are lessons about ourselves.
Personally, it’s like I lost and found myself. Most times during these years, I focused on the outside not being as I hoped it would be. And when those things weren’t in my control, I lost control of my inner world too- which is the real me.
Standing here, almost at the end of this decade, I feel more in sync with myself. I’m not someone new, but I’m definitely more me — and I’m comfortable being me; albeit slightly more balanced than when I went in. And let me tell you something I learnt the hard way — it is extremely unfair to doubt yourself when some things or people are not going your way. Even if the entire world seems not to understand you, you stand by yourself. You love yourself. You celebrate yourself, always.
So, no matter how messy your ride has been, when you let go and trust the process, it always turns out to be magical by the end. There will be happy times again. You’ll believe in magic and love again. You’ll value yourself enough to give yourself everything. You’ll cherish your emotions, your body, your peace, your connections. It’s a journey I couldn’t avoid and neither can you.
You’ll find yourself trying again — and that is what we all have to do: show up! Show up messy, show up magical. Because who are you if not you? No matter how many people surround you, it’s a solo journey back to yourself. And it is completely worth it — because the prize is you.
There would be no Goodmess without this journey. I began conceptualising the brand in 2023, knowing deep down it was an extension of myself. I always felt in my heart what it stood for, but for the longest time, I couldn’t quite find the right words to express it. Until a few months ago. Because as I became clearer to myself, Goodmess became clearer too. Like I mentioned earlier — I lost and found myself, and in the process, I found Goodmess.
Our clothes are more than just fashion — they’re companions for your twenties, pieces that hold space for every messy, magical, exhilarating, and confusing moment. They’re made to celebrate you, exactly as you are, and to remind you to show up for yourself every single day. Whether you’re discovering yourself, losing yourself, or finding yourself again, Goodmess is here to wrap you in confidence, comfort, and joy.
Because the essence of this decade — and of life itself — is learning to love yourself through it all. To honour your emotions, your growth, and your unique journey. Whoever you are, wherever you are in your twenties, we hope you’ve done, are doing, and will continue to do them well. Celebrate yourself. Celebrate your twenties. Celebrate your good-mess!
Ahhhhh! Moves me, as always, in some way. That’s the best part about getting a little peak in someone’s life, you find so many similarities from your own life.
Great piece, so true and honest!